Slap Your Co-Worker Day (soon to be renamed “Resume Preparation Day”)
Today is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday. Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don’t give a damn about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious,when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it? Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very very glad to officially announce tomorrow as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY! Here are the rules you must follow:
* You can only slap one person per hour – no more.
* You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day.
* You are allowed to hold someone down as other co-workers take their turns slapping the irritant.
* No weapons are allowed…other than going upside somebody’s head with a stapler or a hole-puncher.
* CURSING IS MANDATORY! After you have slapped the recipient, your “assault” must be followed with something like “cause I’m sick of your stupid-ass always messing up stuff!”
* If questioned by a supervisor or police, (if the supervisor is the irritant), you are allowed to claim a physical version of Tourette’s….
Now, study the rules, break out your list of folks that you want to slap the living day lights out of and get to slapping…..and have a GREAT DAY!